On an upcoming Saturday of twitter’s choosing we will all message all the celebrities on twitter with the following statement:
“Either you start following us back or we will stop following you #RudeCelebSaturday”
The above is only 57 characters, and so that will leave plenty of time for the @twittername of the celebrity in question.
We will start each tweet with a fullstop, so that the tweet can be seen by everyone. Therefore a #RudeCelebSaturday tweet should look like the following:
.@FamousPerson Either you start following us back or we will stop following you #RudeCelebSaturday
We will then do this every Saturday until celebrities on twitter either accept that the normal rules of their closeted lives don’t apply on twitter, or else fuck off onto Google+.
Celebrities on twitter will be required to follow a minimum of 500 non-famous people back. As soon as a twitter celebrity is following this number of people, they will cease to receive the above message from everyone on twitter every Saturday.
If any celebrity is seen not to be replying to the tweets of non-famous people who @reply them – at a rate of at least 10 replies a week – they will receive the following tweet:
"Reply to our tweets or we will cease to spend any money or time on your work #RudeCelebSaturday"
If a twitter celebrity doesn't start following people back they will receive the following tweet:
"Follow us back or we will cease to spend any money or time on your work #RudeCelebSaturday”
Get on it.
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